The first night I was there, I performed at a philharmonic hall in the city of Irkutsk. I returned to my room and as I was gathering my things and trying to sort out my suitcase, I fell and hurt myself.
I am clumsy on a normal day, but I had never fallen in such a way where I'd hit my head so hard that it left me bleeding and with a big knot on my forehead that left me in tears. If I had hit any lower, I would have broken my nose.
No one ever expects these things to happen, though sometimes it is good to be prepared. Something as simple as a safety kit with bandages, cotton balls, alcohol pads and ibuprofen can benefit you when something like this occurs; especially when traveling. But for some reason, I did not have that with me.
I am very weary of sharing problems with people. I rather share good information and seem happy than to admit that there may be something wrong. I rather appear as someone who is invincible than someone with truly human weaknesses, such as an injury that could leave you with tears in your eyes and confusion. But it did.
Sadly, I came to a realization that being in the tight corner where I was, a million miles away from home and somewhat feeling helpless, I had to break down and confess it to someone who might be able to help me in my situation. And I did.
Being the strong and stubborn person that I am, that was hard for me. But, I found out that there are people who actually care about my position who will come to my aid if something is not so swell. I found out that even in my weakness, it took strength to call out and admit that I needed help. I found out that God is always there no matter what and his voice can move you in your desperation to take action and to change your situation. And he did?
Though there was a minor salvaging to help correct what was wrong in the moment, I was left with a scar that I tried to hide with my bangs. I could see my own facial disfigurement and it was a little upsetting for me. However, I find that there is nothing like getting on stage in front of a crowd of people to change my mood.
So it was a great thing for me to be able to cry out my miseries the next night as the Doctor Jazz Band & I took route to the city of Angarsk in Siberia. We were set to perform that night at this beautiful theater that was decorated in blue and with its fascinating architecture that made me bubble inside.
It took me a while to get into the soundcheck I'll admit. We were in the midst of rehearsing songs but my mind was in a distant place trying not to think so much about how I had hurt myself and to instead focus on the music. Even the band members seemed worried about me because I am usually a charge of energy but at that particular moment while rehearsing, I was not 100% there.
But then the performance came and everything changed. Somehow, the music and the crowd made me feel better. And what better way to alleviate your stresses than to cry out your woes by singing a song about being misty.
I was too much in love with the idea of being super and not down. I had been misty about not being invincible. My mind was drifting on the unbelief of not having superhuman strength. But when you realize that you are only human and that things do happen while life is happening, it kind of settles in and humbles you just a little bit.
Please check out the live performance of Erroll Garner's "Misty" performed by me, vocalist Stephanie Jeannot and guitarist Sergey Rushkovskii during my concert with the Doctor Jazz Band at that beautiful theater in Angarsk, Russia.
I think this excited me just a bit more because it reminded me of something that the late and wonderful Ella Fitzgerald might have done with Joe Pass. Made me feel just a little bit more enthused to somewhat experience the jazz culture in this meaningful way.
Thank you for reading my blogpost. Have a lovely day!